tricks and treats

It may no longer be Halloween (and, please, Park Nope, take note that it's NOT Christmas, either), but that doesn't mean we have to be done with all the tricking and treating.

Treat:

I collect photos of geriatric pumpkins. You can see the last few years' worth here. This year, I thought it was only fair to also include exuberantly joyous pumpkins.

So, for your delight, this year's inhabitants of the Old Folks' Pumpkin Home:

And some adorable little candy stripers:

Trick:

The physical therapist is killing me. And, my right thigh is getting thinner and more cut than my left. This is NOT good. I'll have to walk more arduously with my left leg to make up for it. Or only wear skirts on my right leg.

Treat:

A fun link for those of us who have a small crush on the future commander in chief. (Thanks, Sarah!)

Treat:

Further juicy details involving my love affair with my chiropractor.

1. He hugged me today.*
2. In so doing, he somehow managed to unhook my brassiere.**
3. We're getting married.***

*when I say "hugged" it's really a layman's term for some sort of fancy back cracking. It was, honestly, the most physical I've been with a man in a long time, but, alas, utterly non-romantic.

** it's one of those annoying, racerback-optional bras in which the straps can come out of their loops so you can cross them in the back. I have never done this. I have, however, unhooked myself as many as 14 times in one day. Note to self: buy more non-racerback-optional bras.

*** this is an out and out fabrication.

Trick:

The heat came on in my apartment today and the whole place now smells like hot dust.

Trick:

I had a dream last night in which I was relegated to sleeping in a sewage drain with mouse poos and rat poos and Indeterminate Vermin Poos (which were long, greenish, and scary). In the same dream, I had one of those odd substitutions that make perfect sense (but only in dream-world) -- a gentleman caller (from my real life) was replaced with Owen Wilson. And we were grocery shopping with his father, who wanted to wait until the cashier he "knew" showed up so we could get all the good grocery "deals." I'm sure there's a message there, but I'm too tired from dreaming it to suss it out.