my landlord's girlfriend

When I handed him my rent check, my landlord told me he had to kick his girlfriend out this morning.

"Twenty five years I've been with her! But she's getting old, and my wife wouldn't have her anymore."

His wife (who is usually only partially clad and damp -- I somehow manage, month after month, to hand her my rent check when she's just out of the shower. odd.) is very vocal, and I can only imagine what kind of shreiking a discovery of that magnatude would cause.

Having not heard it, I had to wonder.

Luckily, it doesn't take me anywhere near as long to write a check as it does to earn the funds backing it, and I was out the door in mere minutes.

Only to find my landlord's girlfriend:

She is beautiful. I would be sad to part with her as well.