blah blah blah blah blah blah (you know you want to read this)

Things I heard today:
In my office (said by, um, someone who looks an awful lot like me), "Ooh, I like Time Warner's hold music. I might call them back just to hear it again..."

On the subway (after a foul odor wafted through the car), "Aw man! That's awful. What did someone eat?! If my grandma were here, I would blame her..."

At a theatre talkback, after I had asked a representative from Ben & Jerry's and a well-intentioned bakery in Yonkers if either company (both of which were there discussing their do-goodery in the community) were doing anything to combat obesity: "Um..., good question." (pause, uncomfortable look around) "Next question?"
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I am beginning to learn, bit by irritating bit, that you can't force people to learn. (And this is not a comment on relationships, it's a simple fact of life at my law firm.) There is an ongoing technology upgrade going on at my firm (which is too boring to detail) and it requires some additional training for a large number of people in the firm. The best, fastest and easiest way to do this, of course, is for me to teach the fewest number of classes to full classrooms.

The way I'm going to do it, however, is to teach as many classes as humanly possible, and then, for the people who can't be bothered to come to my classes, I'll do side-by-side training with them at their desks.

Paint me giddy with delight.

(It's funny, actually, because I like the classroom teaching part of my job the best. It just chafes me that people wait until the very last opportunity to take my classes, and then -- oops! They get stuck doing something else. And then, alas, so do I.)

Mrrrrr.
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I made a new friend at the gym today (who was not a Possibly-Dead-Possibly-Alive-Communist-Dictator-on-a-Treadmill). She got on the machine next to me and started chatting, which, I must say, is not easy 25 minutes into your 30 minute elliptical workout. In between wheezes and gasps (mine), she told me that she had just moved here and found that working out in New York City didn't mean climbing mountains like it did in California.

I, of course, told her that I love climbing mountains, and gave her my card, telling her to call me the next time she wants to climb a mountain (which hopefully won't be in the middle of December...)
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Did anyone want to know how cute I look in my new coat?

The answer is: Extremely Cute, Thank You.