At work the other day, I pulled a jug of milk out of the fridge and it wasn't one of the regular kinds we use at work. This one, for some reason, said "Juicy Taste" on it. So I thought maybe it was the store brand and they had accidentally bottled it in an orange juice container or something. But no. This milk brand's jeenyus marketing idea was to sell "juicy" tasting milk.
Pass the cream, please.
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On my way to the theatre the other night, I was traversing 42nd street with the hoardes and masses when there was a traffic bottleneck. Looking to find the source of the problem (and avoid it like the plague), I identified the "Traffic Enforcement" van from the police department blocking the box.
Nice move, guys!
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The theatre I was trying to get to was the Delacorte theatre in Central Park, for a production of the Winter's Tale. It was a strong production of an iffy play, but I have something I think anyone headed to outdoor theatre should know:
If you fart in an open air theatre, it still smells bad.
Don't do it.
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I sent an email out the other day, trying to clarify a point, and when I asked the recipient if he understood it, he wrote back simply, "presactly."
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2 comments:
I put orange juice in my coffee the other morning instead of milk (by accident, it was early and the cartons are almost identical) - trust me, juicy taste is not what you want in that situation.
And I laud presactly as an early stage of the next evolution of our language. Sometimes you have to break a few eggs.
PS--Farting anywhere is fine, so long as you fess up and say scuse me. Just ask my kids.
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