more things I think should be rules

I'm not a bossy person. (Ok, well, I'm not ALWAYS a bossy person.) But there are certain things in life that I think should be rules. And these are but a few of them:

1. If I am going to pay you a dollar to sit outside the bathroom and sell candy, then I should be able to see myself in the bathroom mirror, and I should not have to wipe the pee off my toilet seat.

2. If I join you at a BBQ, you should not force food into my face. (Really, the way you all did that was reprehensible, and you should be ashamed of yourselves.) (heh heh)

3. If you are going to stroll three abreast on the sidewalk, you should not hold hands.

4. And if you don't heed number 3, then you should at least stick to ONE SIDE of the sidewalk and not weave back and forth.

5. And if you don't heed numbers 3 or 4, then you should HEAR ME AND MY GRANNYCART COMING and move out of the way before I have to say "Excuse me" more than once.

6. If you live in my building, you should definitely put your trash into the trash cans. We have rats on this street and I don't particuarly want them moving in with me.

7. If you are as adorable in 3D as you are in 2D, I should recognize you. (My bad, Taar. Sorry!)

8. All grassy fields should spend at least two weeks without being mowed so little legged dogs can bound through them like they're some kind of jungle grass and feel like herodogs.

9. If you are having your 30th birthday party, you should not have it at a bar full of 23 year olds.

10. If you are a yogi, you should not make snippy comments to me in a class on goal setting.

11. If you are my armpits, you should really make an effort not to smell like a litter box. (what the hell is THAT about, anyway??)

That is all.

For now.