greetings from dumpyville

So I've been a little down in the dumps lately. Maybe it's the weather, maybe it's my job, maybe it's [insert variety of possibilities here].

Regardless, a few things have managed to make me smile lately.

1. The surety of my PT aide.
She knows. Period. No questions, no gray areas. It's black or white and she'll tell you which one it is. And that's the one it will be. (At least for the 35 minutes you're working with her, anyway.) And if you don't like it? Well, those 8 pounds on your gimpy knee might just turn into twelve.

(No, I'm kidding about that part. She's great. I envy her clarity. I wish I could see things so simply and easily. And also believe that they are, in fact, simple and easy.)

2. Car hats.
When it snows, cars that have been parked on the street get these nice four inch hats on their roofs. (rooves?) My favorite is when they blow off in feathery little streams or massive polar ice chunks.

3. Candid emails.
On a dating website, I received an email from a guy saying "I read your profile, or at least the first three sections of it, and I think we'd really get along."

My whole profile is five sections long, and while I decided not to write him back, I was sorely tempted to write only 3/5 of a message.

4. Spanish emails.
On the same dating website, I list that my Spanish is ok, so I got a message from a guy telling me that he sees love and sincerity in my pictures and that he would love to win my heart if I would let him. In Spanish. Luckily, "no" is the same in both languages.

5. Missed opportunities.
I had a date with a guy who was fun and with whom I would have gone out again if he hadn't disappeared into the great hole that is internet dating. We joked the whole time on our date in the park that I was luring him into the woods to kill him. He argued that I should kill him back at my house in the bathtub, where it was warmer and I could linger over the task longer but I said that would take too much clean up (I mean, have you seen my bathroom lately?) The woods would be cleaner, easier, and yes, colder, but better in the long run.

The date ended (sans murder) and we exchanged half-hearted emails for a week or so and then he disappeared. Which is really too bad, because I'd like to send him an email saying "See? I should have killed you when I had the chance!"

It occurs to me that this was the date I was telling the PT aide about...