collected thoughts on jury duty

I served my time today. I showed up for jury duty.

Here are some observations:

8:30-11:00 The Jury Room

Remember the teacher's voice in Charlie Brown? Imagine hearing that give you step by step directions on how to fill in the equivalent of a credit card application.

Also, there was a fabulous movie on the history of jury trials. All I could think about was how psyched the actors were who landed those roles. "Dude! I'm going to be in a jury duty film that they'll show in Brooklyn court rooms for decades! Sweet!"

11:00-1:00 The Empaneling Room

The empaneling room was all of 10'x20' and there were 23 of us in there. It was painted in an exciting shade of Doldrums Gray and the temperature in there was a brisk 98.6 degrees. Perfect attention paying weather!

Three different attorneys explained judicial procedures to us. I fought to stay awake.

"Ms. Neal, do you think you could be impartial in this case? Give both sides a fair shake? Let the chips fall where they will? The case is a blank blackboard and we'll fill it up with evidence. Do you think you could make a decision based on that evidence, and not on anything else? Are you a fair person?"

"Yes."

"Great! Mr. MacDuffy, do you think you could be impartial in this case? Give both sides a fair shake? Let the chips fall where they will? The case is a blank blackboard and we'll fill it up with evidence. Do you think you could make a decision based on that evidence, and not on anything else? Are you a fair person?"

"Yes."

"Great! Ms. Surgeon, do you think you could be impartial in this case? Give both sides a fair shake? Let the chips fall where they will? The case is a blank blackboard and we'll fill it up with evidence. Do you think you could make a decision based on that evidence, and not on anything else? Are you a fair person?"

"I'm sorry, what? I didn't hear you the first seventeen times you said that."

Actually, there was one woman who, when asked if she could serve fairly on the jury, said, "I could, but I don't want to." And then I overheard her muttering something about having to answer to Jesus and what if she didn't agree with the laws?

1:00-2:00 Lunch

I was the obnoxious white vegetarian at Subway over lunch. I ordered a veggie patty sandwich and they were much faster than I thought they'd be, so the patty was in the microwave before I saw them do it. So they kept fixing the sandwich without the patty. And I kept reminding them that this was a veggie patty sandwich, not just a veggie sandwich. I must have said "veggie patty" fourteen times. (And it's not a pretty thing to say.) In hindsight, I was kind of a bitch. I didn't mean to be, but I was.

(I'm sorry, Subway!)

2:00-4:30 Jury Room

They didn't like me enough to empanel me on that personal injury case -- even though the law firm I work with doesn't do personal injury work. (I thought about telling them that the defendants' attorney looked like an exboyfriend of mine, but he wasn't cute enough to sway my feelings one way or the other, so I let it slide). Maybe it was because I explained to them what a technical trainer does -- "I teach lawyers how to use their computers."

So I wasn't unhappy being sent back to the jury room. I checked my email, read my book, and actually watched a movie (since I brought my computer with me).

It was, however, kind of cool at the end of the day, when they read the names of jurors who were being dismissed. It's a long list before you get to "Surgeon," so I got to hear the melting pot of names called, one after another. Caitlin MacBride was right next to Jeanine Moskovitz, who were just behind a series of different Lees and Lis.

Would I do it again? Not for eight years. Was I happy to do it? You bet. I'm so civic it hurts.